Kenangan sekolah menengah awal & revelation of my past

Terharu aku baca blog kawan aku tyme primary skul dulu.. YUp, memang kami banyak persamaan. Suka melukis and suka seni..... Kalau gaduh pun x lama. Haha... rasa nak putar masa ke zaman dulu. I know you know very well who you are.  Hehe... Miss her already, yup, we were separated when we were 13. Just 13 when I have to go to Secondary school . I must say I do not regret going to Sabah College because it is my dream to be able to school there. But Losing my friends are harder. In my new surrounding, confused and scared, I'm lost. Without my friends who always supported me makes me felt very small in this new crowd of people. I had a hard time adjusting and finding friends. I am sure it is me all along, its not their fault that I find it hard to be friend with people. So, I began my reclusive strategy, I felt awkward being alone at canteen during break time, so I would starve myself and hide in the school library till breaks over. I would ponder books by books and it is not hard for me to do so since I love reading books and our college provide us with extensive collection of mystery/ investigative story books. Which are my favorite.

But my life are not dull at all. I tried my best to be courageous and took every opportunity to do what i love most. I am a scout. A hardcore scout. I started when I was 10. I used to go to camps and its kinda a must thing to do every year. I love the jolly people I met in scout and I do believe in its oat. "Believe in your god, loyal to your king and country and abide  the rules of scouts".  So, I continue to become a scout when I was in secondary school. Apart from that, I love drawing and I would use every chance I get to show off my work to my art teacher eventhough it is of poor quality. I am not a pro mind that. I also participate in astronomy club which I found very interesting but my interest soon died out since there's nothing much to do in the club. And the people in the club doesn't seem to be as interested in the galaxy as me.  Its a whole universe out there so, I want to know it if possible. But what to do. Fate leads me to a different path. When I was in secondary 3, I met N and A. They help me a lot especially in subjects that I'm weak at. Maths and English. N would teach me math every morning( actually, I force her to help me ) heh... A would correct me if I make grammar mistakes. She also taught me a very valuable lesson. To not judge people. And up till now, I am still struggling to be a non judgmental person. Thanks... our friendship grew even more stronger when we were in form 4 and 5. This is the time when we formed Group Tengah. There's me , N, A, Y, Ni, H,P,S. But I always felt more connected to N,A,Y,H,and P. But alas, good time never seem to last long for me. I am destined to be alone again when we graduated from our secondary school. Each one of us went our separate ways. I manage to land myself in one of the university in Sarawak. Alone, and so the cycle return. No one I know, new places, misfits and I actually cry over and over again but that my crying soon dissappear as I found a true friend in the form of my roommates. Me, Z ,A, D,and E. We stick with each other like glue.. Hehe... well, I can't tell everything that happen to me in the past in one post. It would be boring not to mention long. hehe.... well, I would continue this story later...There are more to my story than stated above. I never reveal my past thoroughly to my friends because it is too embarrassing since everyone else had a normal life and a very easy one indeed.