Got surprise from Pangkor Island

Love the way it look. Love the color. Love the everything about it. Thanks Win, you really made my day. She got me a surprise gift in a form of an adorable keychain. Owww.... I love keychain and I love weird stuff. She knew I would choose that one over the other three. Haha... Its so kawai'e... I named him Momo after Moo Kyul Ahn. My fav character in Mary stayed out all night. Cuz, he wears like the doll and he plays guitar when he sings. Heee.... here's how my Momo looks like

My Momo a.k.a Moo Kyul Ahn

 Doesn't he look adorable with that guitar and pink jacket over green skin. Hehehehe... Thanks  a bunch 4 d key chain Win.....

Tomorrow is the day

I can't wait for tomorrow. Its so exciting. I am going to UIA. To my friend place. Miss her you know. I'll be leaving my confinement. Hopefully the money I got is enough. And hopefully I can get there easily with no trouble at all. God help me.

Its Mid-term holiday

Well, its mid term holiday. As of today, I am officially all alone in my dorm room. My roomates are going back to their hometown and my friend will be away for camp for 3 days. 3 days of loneliness. Nevermind, hopefully I can get my work done within these coming 3 days. Gonna be busy. And I do hope that there are still people living in the hostel within that time since I don't want to be stuck in the second floor all alone. I f anything, I cannot run outside towards the security post fast enough. Not that it matter anyway since the guard post is almost always empty.

Afraid of losing

What if I lose anymore friends> I had few to and to lose another one I can't afford. Huhu... Please god, let me be a good friend and let me have friends. I know, meeting someone and then losing them is part of life. But I can't handle it the way other people handle it. I may look okay on the outside, but on the inside, my heart. It just filled with 1000 liter of tears, and maybe more. But then again, why do I want to keep them? Because I already felt attached to them since only few able to make me open up even not wholly. I know I am not the best person in your life and I know, in your prayer, you probably ask for circles of friends which you could trust and be proud of and  worthy. So, maybe I am not worthy.(God!! just thought of it) So maybe I shouldn't force our friendship anymore and just watch what happen as time flew by. But I do want you to know, No matter what happen next, If we are not together again. You are part of my life once and during that time I truly am loving you in every way I can as a friend.

Direction of my blog

Layan lagu Melly and Evan sambil berfikir ttg my life. Seems to me this blog is turning into my love obsession confession. Okay, this is the kind of thing I cannot say out loud since, well, let just say I've got issues. Nevermind that.

When all things gone bad

I don't want to be like that. I value our friendship. So please, please, let me go. My heart, if u love me you will listen to me. Please stop being such a brat and listen to mommy for once. I just want to be friends. Sure, when I heard the news, I am sad. I still am. It hurt and I felt like it sliced through my chest. Its good that I am not good with people. But it hurts when I get too close I can't stand losing them . My fear of losing my friends just unbearable. I know, my paranoia kicks in. Need them to say that they're my friends no matter what. but I know, we human, don't usually do what we preach. Soooo missng M already. Its bad enough that my bestie Ami become stranger for now, not another one.

I'm dying to hear that special someone says....

Okay, so my blog has become recently, a disgustingly sappy, overrated romantic, heart pouring  piece of junk. If you read all my post then you'll know. Right now, its like another sappy post. What I meant by the heading is that, I'm dying to hear that special someone says " U r my exceptions" .. Its sweet and touchy and I like touchy cuz I love art and to produce good art, you must be able to touch your audience with your art. 

A dear friend of mine once told me that I will think about marriage during my fifth semester in U. But, I kinda brush him off. Truth be told, I am jealous of other people happiness. I see the smiles on people faces when they're in love. I see a lot of loyalty, commitment, constant attention and betrayal. Well, of course, betrayal not counted here. Its beautiful. 

My friends told me that I should not be dating someone because, well, mostly guys that they met are painfully pain sometimes. Its really pissed me off when I hear their stories and it crush me to see their tears. I..I don't like it when woman being hurt by men. So, I guess that what makes me very particular when choosing the right person to be with. Which ended up by me being single. Haha...well, another thing is that, sometimes I am disgusted at men. For who they are. Its not fair but I can't change my feeling or me.

I guess why I am being touchy and sensitive and wanting to hear something that's impossible is because, I am nearing the age of 21 and I haven't had a single relationship with guys. Its my fault really, I'm too cold. Well you can and can't blame me on that given the way I am raised. 

So, maybe I may hear the words but maybe not. Nobody likes me. I mean in a serious relationship matter. I'm just not mature enough to be in one. Lets just say that I am waiting for someone that's true to himself which obviously not coming. hee.... desperate it may sound but It just me.