Somehow, I am even more depressed in training than in class. Cuz, in training I have to do all the things that I hate. I don't know how long I can keep up with this. With this acting and liars... Hopefully I am strong enough to live by myself without any family at all. Cuz, I am thinking of not returning to Sabah anymore. Since I had been warned not to come home if I insist on leaving QS.
Dying seems more appealing right now. But then again, I am dead inside for a very long time now.
- karina
- To tell you the truth. I am a bad person. I did wrong and never seems to change. I often envy others and often want something but not doing anything to get it. Yeah!! you can say I am lazy. It is hard for me socialize in real life and to make matter worse ,I hate to be told on what to do but I also depend on it as me myself incapable of making my own decision. I wish life can be less complicated but I have been on a bumpy ride along the way and knew first hand it never gonna happen. I read somewhere that easy life are full dull people. I guess I want to be dull. Ironically, I embrace challenge in form of flying fox, motor cross but most of all kayaking. I am 20 something but my brain still haven't progress the way it should be. Maturely. This blog is my life event and most of it may be ridiculously self center and painfully dull. Wink..wink..
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